Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Does it make you feel better?

I tried to write this yesterday but it turned into a rant so I left it for a while.  Yesterday seemed to be "bash the caesarean" day.  In principle I agree with the idea that women who request an elective section should be given counselling to persuade them that natural birth is nothing to be afraid of.  The fact that a C-Section is riskier to both the mother and baby is not in dispute, neither is the fact that it costs the NHS more money than a natural delivery.

But isn't it time we stopped looking at everyone who has a C-Section with criticism?  There are many reasons why people have a caesarean and being "too posh to push" is only one of them.  Everyone extols the virtue of a "natural" birth and wear their pride about having one like a badge of honour.  Which is all very well if everything goes to plan, but let me tell you - sometimes labour can progress very differently and there is nothing natural about a long, painful, traumatic birth.

When Moonchild the Younger was conceived I had panic attacks if I thought about experiencing another labour that could be in any way similar to that when his brother was born. So Moonchild the Younger was dragged screaming into the world through the sunroof.  But not because I had requested a caesarean, far from it.  I did everything I could to convince both the consultant and midwives to let me have a normal delivery, but they wouldn't budge on the matter.  I was still down as an "Elective" even though I may have feared another awful labour, I feared a C-Section rather more.

Moonchild the Younger was breech.  I spent hours on all fours with my bum in the air trying to shift him, frozen peas on my bump didn't work, visualisation didn't work, two attempts at an ECV didn't work.  He was comfortable with his head up by my ribs and the boy wasn't for turning.  So why should I be made to feel guilty?

I took unnecessary risks by having a C-Section, I cost the NHS more money by having a C-Section etc etc.

I speak to other women who have had sections, for whatever reason and generally they feel like a failure.  They failed to bring their babies into the world themselves, they failed to have a natural delivery and the whole birthing related community looks down on them from their righteous high moral vantage point.  Maybe only those who've had a section understand those feelings, maybe it's not intentional, but the feeling is still there.

I've had a normal delivery and I've had a section, so I feel qualified to say that it really doesn't matter.  It doesn't matter how babies come into the world as long as whatever decisions are made, are right for both the mother and child at that time.  As long as both are happy and healthy, there should be no guilt.

So please, next time you see the caesarean rates, don't point the finger.  The rate is what it is for many reasons, it isn't all down to women requesting sections.  Don't think we wasted money, don't think we were too posh or too scared etc etc.  We just had a baby.  How it came into the world is no-ones business but our own.

Posted by Sandra Squire | Comments (1) | Trackbacks (0) | Permalink